On the bright side of the road.

There are so many quotes about life and things out there.
I wonder if the day will come when everything has been said.
Maybe it already has happened? Perhaps all those new phrases and slang and quips and funnies have all been said before.
Are we all just a more cultured version of that guy in the office by the water cooler who recites a line or two from 'SNL' or something more obscure like 'The State' or 'Viva Variety'
Somehow that guy is the funniest one in the room. Just for reciting someone else's lines.
I don't think I am the one to start spouting off new and amazing theorems about the world. In point of fact, I don't find myself all that clever. I have some moments, sure, but so does that one guy in the office who has been watching Comedy Central for the last 15 years. Hell, I've been doing that too. Maybe subconsciously, I have been stealing lines from shows I saw in Jr. High when I would sneak downstairs at night to watch tv when my parents were asleep.
I'd like to think I'm not, but one can never be too sure.
I have one line that I do use that I blatantly stole from a really good book 'The Perks of Being a Wallflower'
I guess it isn't really a line, but more of an adjective. A descriptor I use in the same vein as the main character in the story: Infinite.
I use it all the time, as it makes sense to me. I feel it is the best way to describe all of the things that for lack of a better term 'Turn me on' (and not in a sexy way)
Infinite.
Limitless.
Forever.
My friends do that for me. They make me feel infinite.
My family, for the most part, makes me feel loved and appreciated. Infinite.
It's a great word, that.
I think f it as a great compliment for everything I use it to describe. What else could you say to someone that lets them know they make you feel like you could go on forever even if it is in the context of a moment in time? I can't think of any because when I read it in that book over 10 years ago, I stopped searching for another way to tell people I care about how they impacted me. And I suppose I am not being truthful. I don't tell people all the time. Just when the moment feels right. When I know full well that they will understand what it means for me to say it.
It's all dependent on the situation. And even the person.
More often than not, I keep it to myself. That isn't right, to keep stuff like that to yourself.
And if I did New Years Resolutions, I would make that my own.
Tell people more.
Don't keep it inside for ridiculous reasons. Even if it means you will be embarrassed or you risk crying. Tell people more.
It isn't easy, but neither is living with that feeling of 'I could have said more'
I could have
I should have
what if I had?
Those ones with the question marks are probably the worst for me. Those lingering questions that haunt you and run over and over in your mind. They make you crazy. And isn't that a definition of loony tune? doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result?
I think that is why Time travel movies and books are so popular. It brings that fantasy to the forefront of your mind that feeling of 'Shit, that would be so cool if I could go back and say that one big thing I needed to say at that one critical moment...all my worries now would be gone'
I find regret to be one of my biggest fears. I am afraid of regretting an action or an inaction.
I am afraid of hurting someone I love.
It is something I should work on, because it can be boiled down to being afraid to live, and that's just what I want to do: I want to live.

You hear people all the time saying that they don't regret a single thing they have done.
Bullshit.
What a huge lie!
I regretted hitting the snooze button during a nap this afternoon.
I regret not putting my clothes in the washing machine until just now because I will be up way later and I will be tired for work. It goes on and on.
Cause and effect, I guess, but if you hear someone say that they regret nothing, slap them silly and ask them if they regretted you slapping them.
In the end, regret is just another word. It means lots to lots of people.

I'm not against New Year's resolutions. I'm certainly not militant about it.
Getting militant about things is silly to me.
Like religion. Militant about religion? Something is wrong with you. Let me think things about God the way I want to think about them. Please don't force me to believe exactly like you.
Militant about cell phones.
Seriously?
I know you grew up without one.
I also grew up without the internet and pens with laser pointers on the end to torment my cat.
But now I have them, and I have porn and a dizzy pet. The future is here. Now!
Your brother's arm just got cut off in a blender. I tried calling you, but you were at the grocery store. If I had been able to talk to you, you could have told me to stop screaming at all the blood and your brother wouldn't be terrified of smoothies for the rest of his life.
I'll leave this rant for another blog. I have more to say.

But yeah, I just don't do the resolution thing. I think it's because I am lazy.
But I don't think people who do do them are lying to themselves and stupid.
I felt like I needed to clarify. Sorry.

I've kind of fallen off topic here. oh well.
I am not the type to go back and correct content on the blog-a-roo.
I rant and go all over the place.
I was talking about feeling infinite. And to keep it much shorter than earlier, I am going to try and tell people that they mean that much to me. That they make me feel like forever's gonna start tonight or something.
Hope your 2009 is something special.

Stay Awesome or I will talk to you about cell phone plans that fit your budget and your lifestyle...

Andy

ps- come to The Monday Night Comedy Show this Monday the 12th? I'd like to see you and tell you secret riddles about mysteries... and say hi.